i'm just so upset now.
the last emo post was out of stress, but this emo post is just plain out of... depression. /: urgh.
i cant stand the world. wy is everyone treating me so... badly? J's daoing me, S's daoing me, Y's daoing me, and like everyone. they dont care about me, and they like... i dont know. they're all my good friends and stuff, so obviously it hurts for me to see them not really playing with me, just going mad and everything you know. and when i try talking to them, they seem to be so preoccupied with other stuff. they seem to be so.. not bothered to talk to me. and it just makes me upset you know. but they dont really seem to care.
i tried to be happy and everything during geog just for that 2 seconds, and Y put me down so that quickly. 'shush'. does she have ANY idea how bad i take that? does she have ANY idea i fell so much into depression, that i could feel tears burning in my eyes, and i had to blink them off.
J is just so... nonchalant. about... me? i dont know. i just dont really feel like talking to her anymore. but you know, i treat as a really good friend. as in, she's nice, and i like talking to her. at least, like
d. this is just so stupid okayy.
S seems to be more aware of the surroundings i guess. she's kinda concerned of me, but i'm just so upset i couldnt be bothered to put up a false and happy front for her. i'm sorry, if you know who you are. shit, i can feel tears in my eyes.
rachel was so innocent when she said, 'is my drawing pretty?' she was so... innocent, i felt bad. i dont know why, i just felt so weird and i really thought i'd cry there and then. luckily the bell rang at that moment. oh well.
i cried at home again. school's bad anough, but my family's even worse. MY FREAKING MAID. like, what the heck!? isnt the she employee? arent my parents paying her? then why is she acting so high and mighty in front of me? fancy taking my tv card, right in front of me! even my own mummy didnt say anything, BITCH! (pardon my language)
and my sister had to push me around. okay, so maybe she's two years older than me, but who does she think she is? if she has no freaking mind to think, my mum is her mum. her mum is my mum. she cant just push me around, FREAK.
urgh. i cant stand her. I CANT STAND HER! she is such a hypocrite. like, EW! i hope you go somewhere far far away, and i never have to see you again, cause you're always so jealous of me, even i get sick of it!
she's not the hypocrite around. well, watch your backs, bitches. i'm still around.
i feel so bad; i feel so sad.
Sophie Kinsella(Shopaholic series)
Go crazy.